Here it comes, START SCREAMING:
1. New Orleans Hornets – Anthony Davis
ONLY OPTION
2. Charlotte Bobcats – Michael Kidd-Gilchrist
SURPRISED THEY DIDN’T SCREW UP
3. Washington Wizards – Bradley Beal
TRADE FORCED THEIR HAND
4. Cleveland Cavaliers – Dion Waiters
SCORES JUST LIKE KYRIE IRVING
5. Sacramento Kings – Thomas Robinson
THEY ALREADY HAVE THIS GUY
6. Portland Trailblazers – Damian Lillard
FITS THEIR NEEDS BEST
I’M PERFECT FOR THIS TEAM
7. Golden State Warriors – Harrison Barnes
PERFECT PLAYER FOR THIS TEAM
8. Toronto Raptors – Terrence Ross
SHOOTING TRANSLATES TO THE PROS
9. Detroit Pistons – Andre Drummond
HE WILL NOT SUCCEED
10. New Orleans Hornets – Austin Rivers
THIS TEAM ALMOST LOOKS MEDIOCRE
11. Portland Trailblazers – Meyers Leonard
HE’S TALL. BUT THAT’S IT
12. Houston Rockets – Jeremy Lamb
SURPRISED HE FELL THIS FAR
13. Phoenix Suns – Kendall Marshall
PERFECT SITUATION FOR PHOENIX
14. Milwaukee Bucks – John Henson
25 POUNDS SHORT OF AMAZING
15. Philadelphia 76ers – Maurice Harkless
GOODBYE ANDRE, IT WAS FUN
16. Houston Rockets – Royce White
SUPER VERSATILE BIG, FITS NICELY
17. Dallas Mavericks – Tyler Zeller (traded to Cleveland)
OWNED CLEVELAND IN THAT TRADE
18. Houston Rockets – Terrence Jones
GREAT DRAFT FOR HOUSTON
19. Orlando Magic – Andrew Nicholson
NOT THE BEST BIG LEFT
20. Denver Nuggets – Evan Fournier
EUROS ARE IMPOSSIBLE TO PREDICT
21. Boston Celtics – Jared Sullinger
TOO TALENTED TO BE LEFT
22. Boston Celtics – Fab Melo
NEEDS TO LEARN FROM GARNETT
23. Atlanta Hawks – John Jenkins
WEIRD FIT, BUT HIGH POTENTIAL
LATE SECOND/UNDRAFTED MY ASS
24. Cleveland Cavaliers – Jared Cunningham (traded to Mavericks)
WHO IS THIS GUY?
25. Memphis Grizzlies – Tony Wroten
TOO MUCH ATHLETICISM IN MEMPHIS
26. Indiana Pacers – Miles Plumlee
YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING ME. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS MILES PLUMLEE AHEAD OF PERRY JONES AND ARNETT MOULTRIE? HE’S 24. AND AVERAGE 6 POINTS A GAME IN COLLEGE. LARRY BIRD WILL NOT BE MISSED ON DRAFT DAY. THIS IS THE BRUCE IRVIN PICK OF THIS DRAFT.
27. Miami Heat – Arnett Moultrie (traded to 76ers)
FREAKISHLY MOBILE BIG, HIGH CEILING
28. Oklahoma City Thunder – Perry Jones III
THIS DRAFT IS TOO DEEP
29. Chicago Bulls – Marquis Teague
JUST FOUND ROSE’S 2012 REPLACEMENT
30. Golden State Warriors – Festus Ezeli
ADDS SIZE TO WARRIORS POST
