Saved By the Bell Lessons That Are Still Relevant — Barry Bonds

We all learned so much from Saved By the Bell in the ‘90s. So why didn’t Barry Bonds get it?

Today’s SBTB lesson is taken from “Jessie’s Song,” one of the classic episodes. If you can’t see the link between this episode and the Barry Bonds case, you have no business reading this SpreeGoogs.

Here’s a brief recap of the episode:

We open with Jessie studying hard to ace a geometry midterm so she can get into Stanford. It’s going to be really tough and no matter how long she studies, she just doesn’t get it. To help her study, she starts drinking coffee, so she can stay awake longer. It’s funny because she hates the taste. To take her mind off the test, Kelly and Lisa invite her to sing a little with the jukebox at the Max, and they sound good. Like, really good. Radio good.

Sadly, the Sinead O'Connor evidence tape was determined to be inadmissible in a court of law.

Zack starts scheming as soon as he hears the trio. His dad knows a guy in the record business who is looking for a hot, young female group. Screech sneaks into the girls locker room dressed as a cleaning lady named Sinead O’Connor and records them girls singing, then Zack turns the tape into the opportunity of their young lifetimes. Hot Sunday (the name he picks for the group) us generating a lot of buzz, but Jessie doesn’t have the time to put into the band because she is studying so hard for the math test.

During a study session between Jessie and Slater, he finds out that she is taking Keep-Alert pills to stay awake so she can handle both of these responsibilities. He warns her against the dangers of taking drugs and she promises she’ll stop.

But it gets tricky, because she doesn’t.

Standout lines from the episode include:

Slater: Jessie, those pills are dangerous

Slater: Jesse has a problem, I think she’s taking drugs
Zack: Drugs? What are you, crazy?

Zack: Pills? You mean you really are taking drugs?

The episode climaxes with this iconic scene:

Needless to say, the lesson is that we shouldn’t take drugs. They hurt us and everyone around us.

While it hasn’t been proven yet, there is strong suspicion that Barry Bonds has used illegal steroids to improve his baseball performance. Sure, it worked for a while, he hit all those home runs and drew some amazing crowds everywhere he went while fans waited to see the record-breaking homers. He got paid a lot of money too. But was it worth it? Now his whole career (which was All-star worthy without the steroids) is shrouded in this steroid scandal. It hurts Bonds and his family, friends and mistresses who are getting involved in the case, It hurts his fellow teammates and colleagues who are getting dragged into this whole crazy thing. It hurts the game of baseball to see the all-time home runs leader put into this kind of public spectacle.

*SpreeGoogs does believe that it’s highly likely that Bonds took steroids, but does not wish to condemn Bonds for it until he is actually found guilty or tests positive. Stop trying to take everything away from him, he takes 100 % of the steroids pressure as it is and it’s unfair that everyone wants to take everything away from him before he is even proven guilty. Give the guy a break, he sacrificed a lot to give the fans a good show and there’s no reason to keep pretending he’s the only player who benefitted from PEDs.

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